Byline by Jewel Faye Kipling
An amazing series of events unfolded on this morning’s inaugural journey of the Muëller High Efficiency Engine running between Tucson and Prescott! Our journey set off in high spirits as Miss Flora Waite of Dixie Rails welcomed Doctor Thaddeus Muëller and his wonderful new high efficiency Ghost Rock engine train to the platform. Finally focused on refining existing designs rather than blindly following the next exploding trend, it truly brought home that the Confederacy is poised to win this Rail War with our commitment to forward thinking design.
The initial leg was not without issue, and the unfortunate speedbumps that I at first dismissed may in fact have been foreshadowing the tragedy to befall us. A rather shady looking man upset no less than Gustav Cunrine himself in the gambling halls, and only the quick action of the excellent service staff of Dixie Rails managed to keep him from declaring the failure of the engine there and then. As well a rather violent Chinese man attempted to demonstrate his “mastery of the martial arts”, and then when trounced by good old American fisticuffs proceeded to attack a man from behind in a shocking display of poor sportsmanship.
I later discovered that not even our noted cadre of scientists were immune to this shocking lax in discipline. Of the three Scientists hired to verify the claims of Doctor Muëller, only one saw fit to actually perform his job.Doctor Isiah Weston was outed as potentially taking Union bribes to sabotage our journey. Thankfully Doctor Orland Easton was committed to actually performing his job.appeared to spend the first half of the journey eating in the dining car rather than performing his readings, and
The perfidy of Doctor Weston was uncovered through the excellent work of Texas Ranger Zina Whitbeck, as well as apparently some help from an unnamed Dixie Rails Indian employee. When that bribery was uncovered, we all believed that the worst was behind us. Little did we suspect that two attackers gained access to the train and began to launch a vicious assault against it. The male attacker struck at the media car, no doubt hoping to kill Doctor Muëller or Miss Waite, while the female went to the rear to attack our noble troops, and prevent anyone from escaping.
Fortunately the brave Dixie Rails soldiers, with a minor amount of help from the Indian “Shaman” were able to overcome the attacker in the rear, and Ranger Whitbeck rallied the troops to the point where even a singer came to defeat the attacker in the media car! In the aftermath we mourned the dead, but thankfully that was the last interruption in our journey and we arrived in Prescott with no further interruption.
Though the perfidy of the Union has yet to be confirmed, no doubt they will prove to be responsible. Nonetheless we must be grateful to Ranger Whitbeck for his tireless work in defending us, and in securing the first journey of what is no doubt going to be a revolution for the South! We are all joined in clamouring for widescale production of this new engine, an hope that Doc Muëller will make his re-appearance soon! Sadly the heroic Ranger could not be reached for combat, as he had departed for Tucson to track down the malefic attackers of this convoy. This reporter herself will be setting out to track their journey and report their no doubt imminent success!